Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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