nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
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