NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
