Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
