just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
