I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Two words: nipple clamps
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