Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
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