I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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