I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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