well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
