Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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