I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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