I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
