Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Randomize
