# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
