i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Randomize
