Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
