we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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