We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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