Well apparently he's into motor boating.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
