we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
and she was petting her beer can
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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