ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
