You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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