i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize