Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
