If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
this beer tastes like vomit already
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
