I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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