I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
