I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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