but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
