i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
