she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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