? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
