Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
