I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
We left the knife in your bed.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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