So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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