So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
