He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
