Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
