The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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