He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize