I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
