The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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