I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
my sisters under your porch take her home
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I need to align my fucking chakras
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
