I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
