she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize