Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
