Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
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