would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
