do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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